Monday, September 24, 2012

Being Dropped Back Into the Sea

Tease no longer!
One of the most terrifying and exciting things after the demise of a seven year relationship has to be the idea of dating again. I know what you're probably thinking - "Hello, it's been like two or three months since your separation, chill out!" Calm down, people, I'm a big girl who knows to wait until she's ready to actually do things! But there's no getting around the fact that I have been thrust back onto the dating scene and will eventually do something about it. Plus, let's be honest, a little voice in the back of my head is screaming, "Oh my god you have to get married so you can have two children before 37!!"

So what's a debutante divorcee to do to prepare herself for her upcoming escapades?? I've talked to a lot of people, married, single and divorced, about reentering the dating pool. And I definitely still have absolutely not clue about how to move forward!!

My therapist did ask an interesting question though: "What are you looking for?" At which point I screamed, "Oh my god I have to get married so I can have two children before 37!!" To which she calmed replied, "So you want a family."

It's funny because my friends know I'm not the most maternal person in the world. And for a while I really questioned whether I wanted children at all. But I've started to go "Aww, lookit the baby" when I see one, and I definitely have already started planning my second wedding (destination Greece, dress already designed by me, groom TBD).

So I guess my strategy will be as follow: when I'm ready, be open to dating all sorts of people, but know when to cut my losses and dip out. I've always been good at knowing when a relationship isn't worth my time - I guess I'll have to be even more efficient now. Anyone know how to identify a guy as  marriage material? After all, I have to get married and have two children before I'm 37!!!!

Sidenote: I was going to put up a picture of me when I was last single, but I have none! Seriously, I even logged into MySpace! So I posted a random, silly one instead.