Tuesday, October 09, 2012

Ready Player One

But it's so high!
So I suppose it's been maybe two months since the official demise of my marriage, which doesn't sound very long. But it's been many more since I subconsciously knew there was little hope in saving it. I suppose you could say I've been in mourning for almost five months now! So when does the bereavement period end, and I get on with my life... ie I start dating again?

I'm not asking when will I feel better. To the chagrin of my friend who has a masters in psychology, I'm doing pretty well. I think I've always been the type to fall apart over the small things and manage true drama with relative calm and level-headedness. It's not that I don't still have bad moments, especially when I'm home alone and I'm convinced I will turn into a dusty old maid. But I'm pretty sure every single woman feels like that on occasion!

But, does feeling better equal being ready to date again? Can I let myself become vulnerable so soon after the biggest rejection of my life? I probably won't really know unless I take the plunge... but what if I meet the guy of my dreams and boff it all up by being too needy or too distant?

Or perhaps these are normal fears everyone in the dating scene has? Obviously everyone is different, but how long did it take you to get back into the game after a big breakup?

PS Yes, I stole this blog post title from my favorite recent book read, Ready Player One, which in turn took it from the start screen of old arcade games. Hmm, I guess that means I'm looking for a Player Two to shoot the millipede of life with me :P