Need Waterproof Mascara

I'm not usually one for pity pics, but how could I not?

I finally seem to have followed a deadline that I've given myself. Sunday I had first real chance I had to break up with First Kiss after 4th of July and I took it - I am again single.

Breaking up with a guy I loved while we were still so happy may be one of the hardest decisions I've made in a good long while. But he didn't see himself married  and with children in five year and I did. Without a future, I know I would have grown bitter and angry and there would never be a chance for us later in life.

Because I'm sadly still holding out a bit of hope. Well, hope alternating with a "When Harry Met Sally" epiphany over and over again: "All this time I thought he didn't want to get married. But, the truth is, he didn't want to marry me. He didn't love me."

It's funny, I did the breaking up, but he did the rejection. Talk about crushing to realize.

So off I go again on my journey to find real love...